You dirty monsters

I don't get it. I don't get why some people are just incapable of keeping clean. After a month of bathing in yellow-stained bathrooms and using dirty laundry room, I have lodged a complaint, which turned out to be effective. The next day, everything was spotless. Few days later, the sink was clogged with maggi mee and the area around the sink littered with tissue paper. SERIOUSLY?!!! You dirty monsters! Whoever that did that.

Come on, what good does it do you to have the sink clogged up? You won't be able to use it later on. Why can't you throw your tissue paper in the garbage bin just few STEPS away? Not to mention the previous monster, who left her sanitary napkin in the bathroom. I had to close my eyes when I showered so that my vision would not be tainted by that disgusting sight. Come on, leaving your napkin lying around was something forgivable, though not excusable, when we were in secondary school. The sanitary bin is just outside the bathroom, for God's sake! I thought we are past that now. We are in our 20s, we are young adults, we are women now. JEEZ..... 

I am not asking you to clean the toilet or whatever. You just have to clean up after YOURSELF. Even dogs and cats clean up after themselves.

If Wealth ≠ Happiness and Poverty ≠ Happiness, then I choose Wealth.

I spent my Saturday watching Gossip Girl Season 4, up till episode 11. That was all I have. I always need to spend some time mulling over a movie, TV show or book after watching or reading them. I find myself admiring the characters in Gossip Girl, the easy life they seem to have, the endless amount of wealth to their name, the beauty and perfection of their appearance (but not personality). With so much wealth, they do not NEED to slog for anything, work or studies. If they want an A, all they have to do is pay someone or kiss someone to have it. But not having to study or work HARD for anything doesn't make them stupid either or maybe they just make it seem so easy. Being born into such high profile families, their genes and breeding have somewhat make them smart with a high EQ. There's not a talent or skill which they can't acquire with money nor a language which they can't pay to learn. Culture, arts, tradition, experience- everything they want, they can have. Such is the privilege and luxury you can enjoy with wealth. I don't understand those people that complain and say Money can't buy happiness. Can poverty buy happiness then?
You can't buy  EVERYTHING with wealth, but you can't buy NOTHING with poverty either. But at least, with wealth, you can buy SOMETHING.

Whoever said that money can't buy happiness must be someone rich and unhappy. Can money buy happiness? That is a trick question. There is never anything 100%, as we learn in medicine. In fact, in answering our MCQ paper, we are taught that if we see the word 'always' or 'never' in a sentence, then that must be a false statement because 'always' and 'never' denotes a 100% surety. Money cannot buy happiness not because Money is not powerful enough. People tend to think of 'Money' as the focus of the sentence instead of 'Happiness'. Put it this way, do poor people live more happily than the rich people do? A rich man may have everything but is still unhappy. But a poor man can never be happy either because he has no money. Just in case you forget, money can buy you food, clothes, shelter, car, medical insurance, luxuries, holidays, education, experiences etc etc. How can the poor be happy with no money? Possible but difficult.

Occasionally, I will meet people who say "See, that couple is so rich but they can't conceive." or "That aunty has so much money but she is battling with cancer." or "That family is loaded but their daughter is divorced." People who say such things are just plain stupid and condescending. What? Are all these people being punished with infertility, ill health and disharmony because they are rich? Well, they probably should see it from my perspective. Rich people who can't conceive can afford to pay hundreds of thousands for fertility treatment but not so for the poor. You probably see more rich people battling with ill health because their wealth allows them to live longer because they can afford to pay for treatments whereas the poor probably die early in the disease because they can't pay for medicines, surgeries or chemotherapy. The financially-stable (especially women) can afford to seek a divorce because they are financially-independent and secured whereas the poor woman has to be stuck in an unhappy marriage just so she and her children can be provided for.

Happiness can never be traded for anything in the first place. We can pursue it but its ownership is beyond our control. We think Happiness is an object but in fact, it is the Master. So we should really learn to take happiness out of the equation sometimes because it does not mean that we can have it just because we have chosen it. On wealth and happiness, if happiness is taken out of the equation, I would choose Wealth anytime. Everyone would!

Note: Poverty here does not mean Destitution. It simply means NOT WEALTHY. It is more like a relative comparison to Wealth.

Marriage, Sex & Having a baby

We had the privilege of being taught by this wonderful OBGYN lecturer, Prof Shirley Aye. She is the kind of woman I admire- strong, independent, poised, charismatic, a good speaker, strict with a sense of humor and someone who knows what she is talking about. You will be amazed to know how many lecturers who can walk in with that confident swagger and start sprouting nonsense from their slides which have been 'copy and paste' from wikipedia, with the hyperlink unremoved. Jeez...what are you guys thinking? Just because you have a Dr or Prof in front of your name doesn't mean that you can just bluff your way through a lecture. Pleasseeee....We know whether you have or not prepared for your lecture.

Anyway, going back to Prof Shirley, she talked about Sex, Marriage and Having a baby. She mentioned that these 3 things are very different.
Relationship simply means "I am having sex with you" and is ≠ marriage and having a baby.

Marriage= I am going to have sex with you and you alone. 
Having a baby ≠ Marriage.
Religion and culture aside, she mentioned that she is just being practical. She further told us that if we want to have a baby, have it between 20-30 years old, which is the best age to have one, physiologically-speaking. She reiterated "I am just saying IF you want a baby, I am not talking about marriage." LOL! 


I like her more because of what she said. It shows that she is open-minded and non-judgemental, the latter of which is a quality which I think is severely lacking in many. When I was in 3rd year, another OBGYN lecturer was teaching us about STI and do you know what adjective she used to describe those who are promiscuous? She used "those DIRTY women". I literally cringed at that word. I don't know if it was due to her lack of command in English or it was just how she perceived these women as. 'Dirty' or not, it is not for us, doctors or no doctors, to form such a judgement and to manifest it in such an outright manner. Like Dr Soo, the state paediatrician said, we have to use politically-correct terms these days and "Dirty women" is certainly a far cry from that.  

Too desperate?

A few years back, on a flight from Brisbane to Melbourne, I left my new Sony handphone on the tray at the security checkpoint. I realised only when I was onboard the flight. After a few days of tracing through phone calls and going through a few procedures, I managed to get my handphone back.

Lecture ended at 5.30pm yesterday. I left my pencil case in the lecture hall. The next morning, which is today, when I went to class at 8am, the pencil case was gone! It was there for only less than 24 hours and the lecture hall isn't the average huge lecture hall that you imagined. It is basically just a room, about a quarter of what a typical lecture hall should be. Not to mention, there are only us, my class, that is using that room as it is the semester break now. And the probability of someone using the lecture room was very low as it was after 5 already. So who stole it? My colleagues? The cleaner? Some cheeky people who went to the room for a night rendezvous? I was furious, sad, frustrated and mostly, disappointed. Ironically, I would understand if someone commits burglary or kidnapping because the burglars or kidnappers must be pretty desperate. But is the thief who stole my pencil case VERY desperate to have a pencil case? 

It is not a serious thing, really, losing a pencil case. It's just that I never expected it to happen. I was so sure that I would get it back this morning, that I would see it just as I left it, on the side of my chair. After all, who would want to steal a pencil case?!! Apparently, I was very wrong. One friend has actually seen it before he left yesterday, but it never occurred to him to take it and keep it for me. I am sure he was just as confident as me, thinking that nobody would be interested in stealing a pencil case. 

Sigh...I sure hope the person is a poor chap, who is badly in need of  pens, ruler, pencils, erasers etc. The thought of this somehow helps ease my anger a bit and somewhat replaces it with sympathy for this person. But I still need to stress this. No matter how poor or how desperate you are, 

IT IS NEVER RIGHT TO STEAL. 

PS: I am actually still hoping that I might have made a careless mistake and misplaced it somewhere. Please God, let it be MY mistake this time. 

My new favourite

Alex Goot- my new favourite!     http://www.gootmusic.com/

I got my oxford shoes! FINALLY! And I got them for only RM29!!! on a discount at the newly-opened Cotton On in One Borneo. Happy :)

GO AWAY

How do you tell someone to go away in a nice way? How do you deal with someone that is annoying the hell out of you? Seriously. I actually googled 'How to deal with annoying people' and it wasn't very helpful. Not when that person has absolutely no insight, is delusional and has grandiosity. I find it so exhausting at the end of the day because of the tremendous amount of extra effort and tolerance that I have to put in to deal with such a person.

What further aggravates the situation is that I have a very short fuse. I am not a patient person by nature, though it doesn't mean that I can't be nurtured to be one. I am trying very hard, really, to control my temper, to NOT roll my eyes, to control my facial expression, to smile more often, to speak in a softer and more polite tone. But it's not always possible, especially when I have had a bad day. I like nice people, everyone does and so, I try to be nice too. One of the things I always ask God for is to bless me with kindness- to be kind in my thoughts, in my speech and in my action.Somehow, I believe I have mellowed quite a bit (don't laugh!). That's because previously I was in the comfort of close childhood friends, who know me inside out, who know that my outburst disappears as fast as it happens. But I am grown up now. I am out in this world, all alone, among strangers, acquaintances and colleagues, whom ironically, I have to make extra effort to get along with. And so, I can't afford to just blow a fuse as 'freely' as I could. But, this has turned out for the better. I vote for whatever that can make me more tolerant, although I still think having A BIT of a temper doesn't hurt because that helps keep bullies away. I have never ever been bullied.

How did I go from talking about annoying people to my temper?! I have been having flight of ideas recently. Anyway, please la, God, keep all these annoying people away from me!

Swearing helps

I got some news which I don't like. I started blaming everything and everyone else, except myself, of course. There are times when you can't pinpoint whose fault is it. It's just like when life has been unfair to you. What and who can you blame? Blame life? Blame the world? So, naturally, I narrow it down to the few parties or people who are directly related. Affanculo!!!

You know when you come across a photo or a video or a joke sometimes and they are so funny that you always say, Well, I will certainly take a look at this and have a laugh when I am having a bad day next time. For the life of me, I can't think of any image, words or video that can make me laugh now and I so badly need one. Vaffanculo! Well, at least, Nad taught me a new word through which I can express myself. That helps. Swearing helps! Don't tell me that it's not nice for girls to swear because I will bite your head off now. Girls are humans too. In fact, I think girls who don't swear are abnormal. I mean you don't have to say Vaffanculo all the time. 'Shit' or 'Damn' is a milder form of swearing as well.

Anyway, photos of Melissa and Denise might help. Jeez...Juliet, what have you done to Melissa's hair?! She looks so aunty. Probably it's just the photo. 


And life goes on, whether I like it or not. I hope the next time, for a change, I will blog because I feel so much joy and happiness that I can't contain it.

Can I know what have I gained, please?

I want something badly but I can't have it.

http://iloveindiaa.blogspot.com/2010/05/famous-quote-inspirational-and.html

And I am supposed to have gained something else instead!!! FML! Hopefully, 3 years down the road, in retrospect, after deep contemplation, I might then learn of what I have gained. It better be something good.

I will survive

I feel weird. I feel uncertain. I don't feel up to it. I am excited but afraid at the same time. I am eager to work hard but there is a voice inside my head telling me to not take it too hard, too fast. I tell myself it's a marathon, not a sprint, at least it has been thus far, although I was always better at sprints than marathon. But that's beside the point. Certain knowledge which ought to be in my brain is simply not there, after all this while. And those that I seem to have, I somehow can never feel confident and utterly certain enough to say it out loud. I feel that I have learned a lot but what I have learned is just the tip of the iceberg... no, not even that. The more I learn, I realise, the more I don't know. I have tried my best in every posting, every exams and yet, I always feel I could have done better. I am often dissatisfied but I try my best to count my blessings.

All these sum up to one feeling, without which I wouldn't be feeling all that crappy....STRESSED! ALREADY! on Day 2 of my final year. It doesn't seem all that scary when I forget, sometimes, that I am in final year. When I am reminded of that fact, the dread comes back.

BUT, I know I will survive. I have to. Besides studying my ass off, it looks like I need to pray as hard as a Carmelite nun.