Distressed but smiling

In medical now.

Busy as hell.

Life sucks.

Shed a few tears yesterday.

Came back and prayed like mad.

Night shift was much better. I felt much better.

Went for a second date today. Laughed so hard at a few hilarious stories.

Going to bed with a smile. 

Though I do not know the outcome, I am grateful for the moment, at the moment. For the many conversations with you. For the handphone beeps that signaled your daily messages. Each of this beep always makes me smile, even in moments of distress while at work, especially when I need to feel a slight inclination to smile to dispel some of my distress. And it always works. I thank God for your current presence in my life. And I hope and pray we will have a good outcome :)

My heart wept

We have an abandoned baby today. He was found in a tupperware and abandoned in a public toilet.

My heart wept for him.

He is such a beautiful baby, so round and handsome...really a handsome beautiful baby boy with such beautiful eyes complete with the double eye lids. And a dimple. Yes, you guessed right. I have been cuddling him for 15-20 minutes, just staring at him, mesmerized by his innocence, beauty and cuteness.

HOW...JUST HOW....TELL ME HOW....HOW CAN ANYONE ABANDON SUCH A BABY because I can't bear to put him down myself. If there hadn't been a new case for me to clerk, I would have just held on to him for a full one hour until I had to knock off from work.

How can anyone abandon their own baby, for that matter, cute or not?! They are your own flesh and blood, your cells and genes, YOU make them and bring them to this cruel place we call Earth. Instead of protecting them from the harshness and cruelties of life, you throw them to the wild, defenseless and leave them to fend for themselves. It is no better than murdering your own children.

I feel so helpless. What can I do to help this baby? What can I do to help all the abandoned babies out there? What can I do to prevent or reduce the cases of abandoned babies? I hope I can do something, I wish I can do something. I vow that I will do something probably not now, but in the future, when I am in the position of more power/ respect/ status. Or anyone has any suggestion of anything that I can do now?

Arrghh...it's frustrating and saddening at the same time!