I have been feeling depressed lately. I have no idea why. Ok, maybe I have a few worries but who doesn't. I guess I understand now the feeling of a depressed or bipolar patient. It's a persistent feeling of low mood that you know is not normal and is not you. You know something is wrong with you and you try doing all sorts of things to feel better. I tried going to watch Eclipse alone for the second time and it worked, for that day at least. Then I tried going swimming on this day when I felt like I was having an anxiety attack, with chest tightness, panting breaths and palpitations for God knows what reason. And I have been having neck and shoulder ache for months, which now I think COULD be a symptom of anxiety disorder. But so far, it hasn't affected my sleep and daily functioning and I really hope it won't.
Or am I just malingering or suffering from somatoform disorder? But I don't think so because I am not feigning all these feelings to get some sort of personal gain.
Whatever it is, I hope I get over this period FAST. It's just awful, not feeling happy. Every of my laugh sounds fake and forced. My quick temper has gone even 'quicker' now. Lol... I'm sure my group mates must be thinking I am having PMS or premature menopausal symptoms...haha..but probably not.
Or is it just being in psychiatry posting that is affecting us? D has been feeling low these few days. N has some odd feelings too. And of course, SL is completely manic. Wish I can be manic instead of depressed.
I don't know what the upside of all this is. I usually try to find the upsides for every bad thing. I guess it makes me appreciate happiness more? How lame is that..lol! Now I'm making jokes for myself?!!
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