I miss you Pa

I kept looking at the gate, hoping and wishing to see my dad walking in through the gate in that quick and energetic pace of his.

Everything I do, everywhere I go, every word I hear reminds me of him.

Every road I drive pass, every building I pass reminds me of my dad.

Every thought that I have is of him.

Almost every minute, I pray silently in my heart and hope fervently that all this would turn out to be a very long bad dream and when I wake up, he would still be around.

No more phone calls from him every time I drive back to JB to make sure I have arrived safely. I am always unsure whether I should turn into Senai on my way back to BP and I would always call him to ask.

I miss you terribly, Pa.

I wish my brain and heart could stop working so that my heart could stop aching that much and I could stop thinking of you that much because it really really hurts.